Comparison is the thief of joy. If we look at our lives measured against those around us, they inevitably seem less than. Comparison is always around us; when we open Facebook, when we “watch all” Instagram stories; even when we send a whats app message, statuses are there to be viewed. Click. Everything is documented today. There’s no breaking free from this intoxicating, publicly available digital world which is getting more and more in- your-face as time passes.
This creates an emptiness.
Juxtaposing our lives next to the lives of others not only makes us feel inferior, it makes us feel hollow. We start to focus on what’s missing in our lives, instead of what we have. So how do we stop comparing ourselves to others? Since this is not as easy as it sounds, the question should rather be: How do we focus on what we have and genuinely feel good about it? Here are five ways you still find value in your life when social media is constantly comparing:
- Practise gratitude relentlessly
You may have heard about writing gratitudes every day and the immense power of practising thankfulness. What you may not know is that you have to persist doing this, almost relentlessly for it to have power and gravitas in your life.
This is almost the most obvious stop-comparing tactic but so difficult for many people. Don’t just unplug at night. Unplug during the day – even from one or two devices (since many of us are using multiple ‘machines’). Get natural, go offline.
- Do self-esteem boosting activities
If it’s a yoga class that makes you feel good, do more! If hanging out with your friends helps to level or raise your self-esteem, increase your time spent doing that activity. Our self esteem can take a knock when we’re comparing ourselves to others so it’s important to focus on activities which naturally heighten your self-esteem.
- Avoid triggers
When you’ve become aware of the triggers which cause you to compare yourself to others, be mindful and avoid them.
- Set Goals
Focusing on yourself and the control you have over your life is the most powerful tool to gather momentum. Write down your goals as this increases the chances of them actualising and eliminate any social comparisons.
When you start living life for YOU and focusing on what you do have, the abundance multiplies. Comparative thinking can happen to anyone but is especially prominent in those that are affected by mood or anxiety disorders. If you suspect that you have a mood disorder or substance related problem, reach out to one of our qualified therapists today. We are a cutting edge recovery centre based in the beautiful Southern Suburbs of Cape Town with a focus on treating behavioural and substance abuse disorders through trauma resolution.